You know something? Over the past few days I've been having some internal conflicts as to which way to take my developing art skills. Shit knows where it really began, but I figure the Sonic picture I was working on for that contest (which I'm probably not going to do now, oh SNAPPITS!!) is where it began. See, in between coming up with multiple ideas and doing multiple pages for them (wasting an entire notebook of acrylic paper no less, though "wasting" ain't quite the proper term; as anyone else'll tell you, one failure will lead to it's opposite success somewhere down the line), it's just come to a point where I feel as though what I've been doing so far (yes, even as recent as the Cowboy Bebop pic) isn't working for me anyone...the process of putting it all together anyhow. This whole time I've been so focused on my acrylics yet have neglected so long to adequately use my other art talents in pencilling, inking, and color pencil/pastel work, and those very things could've made the other pictures a lot better IMHO. That said, at the time I was working ON those pics, I wasn't thinking of as sophisticated and grand ideas as I've been having currently, and with the greater ideas comes a semblence of needing to use some other tricks. Most certainly, I'll damn sure continue to keep working on my painting skills, but there's a really fucking good reason why I've been doing so much pencilling/inking and using color pencils and pastels...I couldn't have just picked them up only to do a few pics and then move off of them, and today's the day in which I've realized why I ever bothered to use them; somewhere down the road, I'd be needing them again to further myself as a whole artistically, and that time's finally come. So indeed, while I'm no longer working on that Sonic pic (my heart wasn't fully in it to begin with though tbh), something much greater's gonna come from that.
And speaking of which, I think another thing that's brought up the onset of this shift in artistic thinking has been that I've been (most very well likely) been going into ideas from the wrong perspective. In essence, I'm talkin' about going in for contest reasons and shit; I'm just not like that. The contests haven't been particularly inspiring for me and (as this latest Sonic contest's proven) have likely been more irritating for me. I'm just a more free-spirited sort of cat and I honestly don't think I give much of a fuck anymore about trying to PUBLICALLY outdo everyone else, as if needing awards and shit to prove that I'm better or not. Personally I know my own skill level; I'm nowhere near the best quite yet but I'm a shitload better than most others, but why boast about it? Not saying that contests serve only that purpose, but that's sort of what it's felt like for me. Another thing I've come to realize is that I've been hypocritical on my own word; that art should speak for itself. For any of you guys that have been around to my dA page and read those novel-length (or atleast end-of-semester college essay-length) descriptions, that certainly gives the impression of a guy who's doing the talkin' for his work rather than the other way around, and I'm pretty sure that's given the impression that I might be egotistic and/or smug, which isn't the case at all. So for now on, I truly am going to start following up on my word on that front; I won't be giving nearly as long descriptions anymore, as that info'll be locked in my dome unless the curious folk happen to wanna know a bit more about it. It's probably for the best really, though I DO still plan on talking about my pics and other projects as I work on them, on a bit-by-bit basis, sometime in the future (just not anytime soon I guess). And all of this coming on the eve of a possible job breakthrough (hehe more on that in another post though).
So there you go guys; my new outlook on how I'll be developing my artistic sensibilities. The end goal being to find a process that I'm most comfortable with, comes completely naturally, allows me to express myself and realize my ideas to the fullest (and learning new useful skills along the way), and work on more ideas that I genuinely like. So uh, there goes. See you later everyone, and live the day to it's end in fashion. Peace an' g'day everybody.
P.S: Don't know if you guys have heard of this already, but there's a new flick on the way called Caroline, helmed by one of my favorite directors, Tim Burton. I GOTTA see that trailer (and those of you in the same boat can join me in on that shit), and the movie of course as soon as possible.
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